Questions Without Answers

What if hold my head up high?

Walk in that room with slow but strong strides.

With confidence and charisma and a smile.

While holding the glass shards I call my heart.

Blood streaming

Tears falling

My chest pounding

What if life is what if in itself?

What if my tomorrow doesn't keep it's promises?

What if i can't heal yesterday's pain?

What if i can't find the strength to get out of bed again?

What if I fail myself with my never ending comparisons?

The comparisons of what i would like to be.

Rather than what I am now.

What if life ends here for me?

Or worse, it's never ending battles?

What if am the stone the builder refused but never became the center?

While the waves of life inflict pain on this body.

What if I am just here?

For nothing more.

Just to be somebody's quick laugh or joke.

While those 2 seconds of joy fades away.

For all good things must come to end.

So where's mine?

The what ifs are so many

They bounce around

They always know how get to me.

What if i was drowning and everyone thought I was swimming?

What if I was crying but everyone thought I laughing?

What if I'm slowly dying inside but everyone thinks I'm doing great?

What if I am never enough?

Not even for me?

The what ifs are always more than answers.

What if

What if

What if

What if everything i worked so hard for was in vain?

Cuz all I can feel left is pain.

Thank you.